Welp, it is the end of the calendar year so it was time for yet another “Bummer Bowl”, the event where I and a few others at our local gaming store Drawbridge Games compete for who is the least good at a given miniatures wargame. This year we played Aeronautica Imperialis, because it’s so delightfully random as a game. It’s a tournament, where the loser is the one who advances rather than the winner. And everyone is trying to avoid the Bummer Belt, a wresting belt with all sorts of trash glued to it to (more each year) that must be displayed as a mark of shame in our gaming area for the calendar year. Try as I might, I failed… so here is me receiving it in the “Loser Ceremony” hah.
I brought an Ork Air Waaagh, because I’ve been trying hard to stick to Orks for a while. And that proved to be a good decision in some ways, as there are some benefits to Ork planes in the game. But their bigger stuff is a liability, because we use the optional damage rules (with fire and smoke). And lots of points in a big model that loses the ability to shoot entirely if it’s lit on fire, and then slowly can take damage if the crew cannot put the fire out, is bad enough with those rules. Gets all the worse when Ork crew proves to be simply terrible at firefighting. So it was two games of my Ork Mega Bommer getting lit on fire with lucky hits then slowly burning to death while it lumbered around the board. Not my finest moments of gaming, hah.
Still was a great time and good friends to do a silly event with. So was all good. Next year I am DETERMINED to not lose the Bummer Bowl. I need to practice and get ready and hone a list for whatever system we decide to play, only to have us decide to swap two weeks before the event and then just have to get super-lucky at the event.
In addition to the Aeronautica planes I painted for Bummer Bowl, we had an all-flyers event this day as well at the amazing Drawbridge Games. And I got two newly painted Ork Flyers ready for that as well: a Burna-Bommer and a Wazbom Blastajet.
Above is the Burna Bommer, and I just plain love the way the Ork airplanes look. This one is loaded with racks of napalm missiles, and I look forward to taking it into battle in games. Below is the Wazbom Blastjet, which is amusing at least–it’s got a force field projector as well as some crazy heavy weapons that it brings to the battle.
I didn’t stop at painting airplanes tho. I haven’t mentioned it here yet iirc, but my big plan for 2023 is to do two things: a series of Ork “Normandy Invasion” events pitted against my friend’s Tau empire forces. Right now I’m starting to prep the drop assault forces for some skirmishes before we get to the larger games. That meant needing an HQ choice that could accompany Kommandos and Storm Boyz. And I thought, why not a Kommando Big Mek, who shoots a portal from the plane to the ground with a Shock Attack Gun, then uses a tellyporta to fling himself through? Just crazy enough to work? So I modded up a Shokk Attack Gun Mek with a Kommandos head and a little tellyporta on top his gun aimed at himself. And I modded the grot being hoovered up by the gun with the head from the Kommandos kit grot as well as a little backpack. Pretty pleased with the very silly result.
Finally, I finished up a Battlewagon. I’ve had this one mostly painted for a while, but it needed to have the highlights completed. So on a snowy evening in last night I cranked out this model as well.
I’m really pleased with the painting progress I’m making. If I push a bit this holiday week, where I do have some time off, I might even hit an exceedingly artificial goal of 365 Power Level/Points (across two games with totally different point/power systems but whatever). Which isn’t itself a milestone, but still represents a whole lot of Ork painting in the year 2022. I also painted a ton of Genestealer Cults stuff, a bit of AdMech stuff, and some Necrons stuff too. It’s been a lot.
Painting Challenge 2022 Progress
Warhammer 40k Orks Power Level Painted: 125
Aeronautica Imperialis Orks Air Waaagh Points Painted: 197
So Bummer Bowl 7 is approaching, which for those who don’t know is my gaming circle’s annual miniature gaming tournament where the loser of each round advances, and the overall loser of the event wins the highly-non-coveted Bummer Belt–which is covered in the plastic spoons that were used as prizes in the early days of the Bummer Bowl (the original was fished out of a trash bin for that express purpose).
Yes, sadly I am the Bummer Belt holder for my loss-win of the tourney in 2021. Hoping to change that this year.
This year, like last year, we’ve selected Aeronautica Imperialis as our game of choice for the Bummer Bowl event (we’ve also done Warmachine/Hordes and Blood Bowl in the past). It’s a fun system with goofy and really swing-y luck-based results that none of us play enough to be particularly great at. While last year I ran my Genestealer Cult-infected Imperial Navy force, this year I’ve been working on an Ork Air Waaagh. And I’ve gotten a bunch of models all painted up for the event!
It’s the same color scheme as my Ork force, and I’m really pleased with it. Above are (L-R) a Dakkajet, a Fighta-Bommer, and a Grot Bommer (plus two little autonomous gretchin-piloted grot bombs that move around the board as markers).
This set above (L-R) is two more Dakkajets, plus the the big beastie, the Mega Bommer. It’s such an absurd thing, I simply loved the model. It’s like a bumblebee: that stubby lumpy thing should not be able to fly.
For the event, the squadron will have no upgrades whatsoever (most of those pretty bombs and missiles will remain in the launch bays). I’m really looking forward to it, as it was a lot of fun to paint them up, and I really do enjoy the randomness of the game and the way it plays. We use the optional rules for damage type, where planes can be trailing smoke or lit on fire–or spin around in a sudden tailspin–and they’re a complete blast for making the game extra silly and random.
Painting Challenge 2022 Progress
Warhammer 40k Orks Power Level Painted: 94
Aeronautica Imperialis Orks Air Waaagh Points Painted: 197
Welcome to the careening light-vehicle bashing demolition derby race for glory (and fungus glory). Each participant can field a single one of the vehicles from the following list:
Sorry, none of these. Daemons players add a Rhino for your CSM allies, and Tyranids if you’re not into Genestealer Cult then get thee to one of their Goliaths!
The rules are simple. It’s an Ork racetrack where the Bad Moonz have assembled to watch a demolition derby take place while they’re killing time before the next Waaagh launches. They’ve looted a bunch of different vehicles and kept them roughly as-is: to see which bits are killy and which bits are sturdy–to save both.
All vehicles have the following modification: they are now BS 5+ and Leadership 7 (obviously, as they’re driven by Orks), and whether Ork or not they’ve got no Clan affiliations (or other codex faction rules, obvously). The goal is to race around the track, causing as much damage and making as many laps as possible. When a vehicle is wrecked, it’s pulled to the side of the track and repaired by a swarm of mekboyz and grot spanners (and injured drivers replaced or jury-rigged by painboyz). Wrecked vehicles lose a turn of shooting and movement (their next turn), then tear off back into action the following round. There is no charge or melee phase–as everyone’s intent on racing rather than raw crumpin’. That said, collisions can happen, particularly at the point where the track criss-crosses. If your movement takes you within an inch of another vehicle at the end of the move, you can choose to sideswipe (each vehicle takes 1 mortal wound), or ram (both vehicles take d6 mortal wounds). It’s a breakneck race, so shooting can only be done at vehicles that are ahead of yours in the race (mario kart blue shell rules). And driving can go off the track if needed, but that reduces speed by d6 inches for that turn. For the figure-eight intersection, vehicles can test their leadership on 2d6: if successful they can take the jump side of the intersection (yes, there’s a jump!), which adds a bonus 6″ to their move for that turn.
We’ll track number of laps, number of spectacular crashes, number of jumps, and number of times each driver reduced an opposing racer to zero wounds. Players will get bonus entries into the prize draw for the top of each of these. And everyone will get an entry for playing. Multiple great GW prizes to be had (Games Workshop themselves provided prize support for our event, owing to the success of the prior one!).
A Few Old School Orks will come out of the woodwork for this one
More Crusade Games, two against Michael’s Deathwatch and one versus Dave’s Ultramarines and Imperial Knights combined arms force. Gonna just do some highlight pics of the games.
Ork Meganobz close in on the Deathwatch
The fast boyz added to the force have been great fun to use so far.
Duel between the Big Mek in Mega Armor and the Librarian–I love the two-tone cloak of the librarian’s paint job. Kudos Michael!
Bikes versus Warbikes
Dave’s Ultramarines meet the Deffrolla
Sneaky Ultramarines used a Crusade-tech teleporter to get behind the grots and wipe them out.
Beast Snagga Boyz hide in the building to try and survive the gatling fire of the Knight
The Waaagh manages to reach the core of the Ultramarines lines
All in all some fun games against a lot of Space Marines. Definitely good fun with the Orks, as the Meganobz rush is just brutal stuff for many forces to face.
Painting Progress
I’m working on some speedier models for my force, starting with a Kustom Boosta Blasta. I’m looking to build a Speed Waaagh as an alternative to my Deffwing all-meganobz force, just to present some varied options to my foes at times. Pretty pleased with this buggy!
Another set of Planetary Empire games with the Orks. Making big gains for Orks on the main map, though honestly it’s in large part due to our other player in the Campaign Enrico (whose Bad Moonz have some serious territory). My Goffs in red are at least foot-holding two asteroids and the big planet.
I think we are going to make our goal the asteroid belt and the main planet. See if we can’t get those two things conquered fully.
Game Four
Hrukgrog and Gagrak were, in the Ork tribe, Minderz. Their job was to help their Warboss, Drozgurk, win scraps with the green energy of the Waaagh. Problem was, their Goffs clan didn’t have any Weirdboyz. The last one they had watched over blew himself up with a particularly strong discharge of energy that came out of his cranium rather than his eyes, ears, nose, and mouth–the right paths for the energy(Gagrak nearly lost his arm to the shrapnel of skull). So they took a page out of the Deathskullz playbook, and just looted themselves a Weirdboy. Amidst the chaos of the invasion of the planets, the allied Bad Moonz force that was fighting alongside them showed that they had more Weirdboyz (multiple towers full!). So Hrukgog and Gagrak just went and snatched one for themselves.
Unfortunately, their scurry across the battlefields of Scylla Prime after abducting their Weirdboy attracted the attention of a scouting Imperial Armiger. Hrukgrog and Gagrak were watching for pursuing Bad Moonz, but entirely missed the Knight’s sighting of them. Which meant that their trail back to the encampment that the Goffs had established on the planet was noted, tracked, and followed by a force of Knights. The deadly war machines of the Imperium struck in a rush, their scouting Armiger Warglaives reaching the Orks first. As Knights cannot be entirely stealthy, the Orks managed to mobilize their forces and rushed to resist the attack’s spearhead: with Meganobz and their drill-laden Battlewagon leading the charge.
The larger Knights followed the smaller, and that’s where the Ork lines simply broke. Scores of foot troops and the elite Meganobz both suffered under their fire and titanic assault. Big Mek Ursatz tried to support the forces, only to watch wave after wave torn apart by one of the Knights. He took a swat from the thing’s massive powerfirst, which knocked him clear across the ruins where they fought to collapse in a heap under the rubble.
Painboy ‘Eadfragg Muzritt also battled the massive knight, fighting in the shadow of it as the remaining boyz were crushed underfoot and via massive fist. His power claw had ample cutters, but they were for bone and flesh not the reinforced armor of the massive knights. While he severed a few cables, otherwise the mighty war machine was unharmed. Thus, when it moved away (to pursue more sizable targets) ‘Eadfragg celebrated. No doubt the pilot of the massive suit was afraid of him, that his warlike prowess was too much for the titan.
Unfortunately for ‘Eadfragg he didn’t quite grasp the tactical situation, nor did he see the Armiger Helverin approaching him from behind and ranging in its twin autocannons on his form. With a blast of rapid shells, ‘Eadfragg’s celebration quickly became a situation where his grot orderly was dragging his shattered body away from the smoking crater that remained.
The remaining Orks had to flee–mounting up in their vehicles, gathering their casualties, and making escapes–in the face of the onslaught of the Imperial Knights. Warboss Drozgurk stewed inside the cabin of his Battlewagon, entirely oblivious to his enterprising Minderz whose actions lured the Knights to attack him. His force was attacked by Knights. And that meant Knights would need to pay. Drozgurk got on his shouter to the Rok supporting the force, where Big Mek Ursatz’ fellows were keeping up the production of weapons. He demanded they use their sighting tools to find him where the Knights were. Knights were going to get krumped, he pledged.
Game Five
The call came two days later. Knights were on the plains of Scylla Prime. The shouter reported how far away and what direction (“many many many seven miles toward the mountains”) Knights were spotted by his Rok-based spotterz. And so with a roar, Warboss Drozgurk directed his forces to make for the mountains. Some of the nuances were lost on the Orks, that this was a household of Chaos-aligned Knights that were themselves hunting the same Imperial Knights that had attacked Drozgurk’s enclave. They were Knights, and that was what the Orks intended to krump.
Waves of Gretchin were summoned from the crews of vehicles and sent forward to be a picket screen against the big warsuits. While the Gretchin were cut down in droves, the main line of Drozgurk’s forces–hard units like Meganobz and Battlewagons–prepared to strike. His main Meganobz mob, now with a few new Nobz who had looted mega armor during the last battle, unloaded salvos of rokkits that started to detonate into the massive Knights. While the armor could take some assault, the sheer volume of explosives started to make a dent.
Such was the vengeance-fueled fury of Warboss Drozgurk that his forces actually cooperated effectively, and timed their assault into the Knights in concert. Wave after wave of Meganobz, the massive battlewagons, and Beast Snagga Boyz all took their choppas, saws, and claws to the assembled Knight forces. Two Knights and an Armiger all fell in the same wave, the catastrophic damage taking even a few Ork casualties as they exploded upon being torn apart.
Only the leader of the Knights, which had a strange flail-like set of weapons on its arm, managed to survive the push. It took strikes back, and despite the power emanating from its massive cannon arm, just could not crack the armor of the Battlewagon that opposed it.
With four other Knights wrecked, the fifth–the leader–limped away to not be destroyed as well. The Orks paused their assault, happy to take all of the scrap that was left from all the fallen knights. Big Mek Ursatz started dispatching his cutting crews immediately, carving up the Knights’ armor and hydraulic systems both to help manufacture even more suits of mega armor. Warboss Drozgurk was pleased. The Knights had changed their colors and brought other weapons, but he still gave them a better krump than they’d given him before. This planet was a good one. Plenty of fights to be had. He called up to the Rok in his shouter again. “Spottaz spot us some moar targets, ya filthy gitz. It’s time ta krump!”
Game Six
The portents were constantly shifting for the Thousand Sons, those ancient warriors of Tzeentch who walked in suits of hollow, dust-filled armor. So many forces were vying for the Scylla system the fates continued to flux–sometimes something that was the right move would suddenly be something to be avoided at all costs when casting their divinations. Their chief sorcerer had even summoned a group of pink horrors to help advise him in where their force should strike next. For the moment, it showed that the Orks were a particular threat: they had attacked and dealt a serious blow to the allied Chaos Knights that were supporting operations in the system. The Orks were indeed a perpetual nuisance, their very chaotic behavior was the antithesis of Tzeentch’s careful planning and decades of schemes. Stopping their random behavior would mean a more predictable system, which meant more of the great Changer of Ways’ plans coming to fruition.
The Thousand Sons struck when the Orks were re-arming themselves in a small abandoned research facility in the plains of Scylla Prime. Ancient Thunderhawks landed groups of their warriors at range, who immediately started the barrage of their deadly fire. Initial fire inflicted some casualties, but it was the Battlewagons that drew a great deal of their fire–and while the great war machines were damaged, they kept rumbling forward. One of them reached the Thousand Sons lines, where its massive Deff Rolla crushed more than a few of the slow-moving ancient suits.
Scarab terminators teleported down onto the battlefield to support the approach, only to find themselves amid the assault of Killsaw-armed Meganobz. The saws proved to be absurdly deadly to the ancient warriors, cutting off limbs and into the central armor itself. Where there had been a full team of ten terminators, only three lived to strike back at the Orks. They managed to kill one, but the remaining two managed to slice the rest of them to pieces.
The psychic onslaught of the Thousand Sons was the only thing that kept their force reasonably in the battle. Slowly but surely they started getting Ork after Ork to fall, their brains burning with the psychic energy. A group of Beast Snagga Boyz was cut down to a man by the psychic onslaught. Arcs of energy ran from the Sorcerers to the Orks, bursting their heads or lighting their whole body on fire.
However, the Orks were too aggressive in grabbing control of key portions of the battlefield, so while their numbers thinned–and the heavy hitters of the Thousand Sons were too easily slain. Meganobz cut down a Deamon Prince, while Warboss Drazgurk himself tore apart a rampaging Maulerfiend himself. Too many losses meant a need for retreat, and the Thousand Sons took discretion as the better part of valor. Soon enough the time would be right for stopping the Orks. Just not this day.
Painting Progress
Finished up the angry Painboy, just in time for him to have his moment of failure hah. Still pretty pleased with how he turned out. I kind of like the survivability it provides the big gang of Meganobz, but man it comes at a higher cost that I’d like so I’m unsure how useful it is. But the model looks great, I think.
Next, finished a unit of ten Beast Snagga Boyz. Really showed me how the red colors will look balanced with more natural colors and skin tones for the orks. There’s always the danger of the Christmas curse with this color scheme: green and red and white accents. But I think I dodge it really well with these.
Finally, first of the Battlewagons–this one a Bonebreaka style. Had fun doing this one, and it took a ton of time to get sorted and highlighted. Finding the balance of black plates with red plates was the biggest challenge of this one, and I think future ones will also have to work to strike that same balance. Needs to be a bit of black, but still the bulk being red, to really look right in my view. So far so good.
I’ve got another Battlewagon in-progress, a buggy, and some bikes, so should be a good next set of completed models with my next update.
After blunting the initial teleporter-based Ork strikes, the Imperial forces moved to consolidate gains across the planet–hoping to whittle down the remaining pockets of Ork resistance. In one sector, the red-daubed forces of one Warband mingled with the mustard yellow of another, the survival situation of being pressed on all sides meaning more than clan affiliations. Their backs were against a literal wall, a big intractable section of collapsed cathedrals meant their only way out was to push back against the forces of Space Wolves and Sisters of Battle that had been hemming them in. And like any cornered beast, this made the Orks more dangerous.
As it was a Shrine world under assault, and the most dire of emergencies, it is no surprise that another incarnation of Saint Celestine awakened amongst the faithful. A figure born and reborn in times of strife, she appeared amongst the Sisters lines and encouraged the Space Wolves to unleash themselves in pure pursuit of the Ork forces. Squads of Space Wolves primaris stalked through the ruined streets, closing the gap on the Ork menace.
The Adeptus Sororitas was also helping close the net, with squads of Battle Sisters and their deadly Paragon Warsuits taking the more defensive posture with firepower. They finished a set of vows that the holy shrines celebrating their most valiant martyrs and heroes would not fall to the Ork predations on their watch: burning incense, lighting candles, and general other offerings to the Emperor. As the husks from the burnt offerings drifted on the wind, they marched forward toward the Ork line.
The Space Wolves were joined by a Knight, Canis Rex, a freeblade Knight piloted by Hekhtur Cereberan. Hekhtur had been working with the Space Wolves to find an enclave of Iron Warriors heretic marines and extinguish them, when the call to defend the Shrine world came. He gladly accompanied the Wolf lords to the surface to lend his Knight’s might against the Ork menace.
It was Canis Rex that led the core of the charge into the Ork lines, and while his massive las-impulsor blew the Orks’ massive Battle Fortress apart right away, it was smaller threats that started to take their toll on the mighty war machine. Squads of Tankbusta boyz loosed their rokkits into the mighty war machine, followed by a bomb squig laden with explosives that damaged the Knight’s right shinguard.
Elsewhere the spearhead of warsuits hitting the Ork lines were making progress. The Bad Moonz had to call their Warboss to the fore to help take out the marauding warsuits, only to eventually be grievously injured by the Wulfen dreadnaught’s scything axe blade.
Canis Rex shattered a Trukk and started turning its sights on the boyz that piled out, only to find a gang of Meganobz with Killsaws come rumbling toward it. With brutal efficiency their saws began carving pieces of the mighty war machine, and it had to cede the field to seek repairs lest it be overwhelmed and demolished. The Meganobz howled with frustrated triumph in its wake.
By choosing to attack headlong, the Imperial forces left their back lines open to the squads of Orks that were escaping the press of the cordon. A mob of Trukk boyz managed to get to grips with Saint Celestine, killing her attendants and gravely pressuring her own defenses. While she cut them down, they had pinned her in place long enough that the tide of Meganobz that followed the Trukk ran her into the ground with their devastating attacks.
The Space Wolves’ Librarian had taken some incidental fire during the battle, and was relocating back to the strategic objective spot to support the Battle Sisters’ lines. A marauding Trukk scored a hit on him with its Big Shoota, and in turning to face the vehicle he dropped his guard for just a second… when a lone surviving grot from a squad of Gretchin tossed a cluster of stikkbombz his way. The shrapnel from the explosions caught him right where his battle plate was already damaged, and a lethal shard of metal carved through both hearts striking him dead.
With the forces that led the attack on the Ork lines broken, the waves of Orks remaining spread out to the reserve spots where Space Wolves and Sisters of Battle squads of the line were holding key objectives. The firefights were valiant, but when the Orks reached their lines the savagery of their assaults finished off the stalwart defenders.
While the Orks had been hard-pressed during the tellyporta attack due to being spread out, they proved that when they could work in concert they were a force to be reckoned with. The third and final phase of the war for the Shrine World was about to commence: the protracted fight where each side tried its best to grind the opponents into dust and ashes. Too much of the world had been already trampled for the Imperials to call it a clean victory, but the Ork Waaagh was still not in firm control of the planet either. The fate of all hung in the balanceas both sides raced toward the final confrontation.
Painting Progress
Got a fair amount done this phase. Finished a classic Rogue Trader era Weirdboy (with his Minderz firing him like a gun). I liked the idea of looting another Clan’s weirdboy, so my red and black Orks stole a Bad Moonz weirdboy to use for their forces. Really pleased with how it turned out.
The karma of finishing up units paid off in the game, as the Grot with the stikkbomb was clutch in the battle. Glad to get these done so I can have them to round out the Battalion.
And I did up a second unit of Gretchin just to keep that flow going. Good to get some of the horde aspects of the army painted up.
Got a chance to play a new player at my local game store, Alex, and his Custodes. Not a Crusade or Campaign game but just for fun. Here’s the write up. Mission was a Nachmund mission: Display of Spiritual Might. My secondaries were Assassinate (he had lots of characters), Domination (I had numbers so thought I might get lucky, and this was definitely a “one has three, one has one” sort of mission), and Stomp ‘Em Good (kinda tough given Custodes were elite, but thought maybe I could pull it off… spoiler alert, I didn’t hah).
Game
It was dawn on the planet, a manufacturing world in the fringe of the Segmentum Solar just past the Cicatrix Maledictum. It had been 8,000 years since Orks ravaged the planet as a part of the War of the Beast in M.32, and yet now they were back. The Cicatrix played havoc on Imperial warp travel, so it well might be even worse on the incautious Orks. Whatever the reason, they had arrived, and the landers had been pouring down from the Space Hulk and pair of Kill Kroozers since they appeared in the system. In the early dawn light, the shadows of the force–particularly a massive Morkanaut–cast long ahead as they fought their way though the shanty town.
While the Custodes were charged with defense of Holy Terra, there was a contingent of them that had been pursuing off-world aims as part of a broader defense (they’d crossed paths with some Genecults that linked back to Terra). As such, they were closest to respond. The contingent, more formal and leadership-heavy than would be ordinary, assembled as close as their lander could get them to the Ork front lines.
The Captain on the Jetbike roared ahead of the main force–which were all on foot–to scout out the battlefield and engage with the Orks as soon as he could. Unfortunately he ran right into the towering Morkanaut. The blistering hail of weapons fire from the towering beast formed such a curtain of electrical discharge, the bike’s propulsion systems caught and sputtered. The metallic beast’s crushing claws managed to swipe the bike once, and with the damage it was all the Captain could do to retreat and get himself and the precious artifact bike back to safety and a Tech adept.
The other Custodes leadership group came in two waves, Trajann and a Blade Champion with the main line, with two Shield Captains in Terminator armor using short-range teleportation strikes to join the attack alongside a group of Allarus Custodians. The Orks had some sort of battlewagon with a massive drill that moved through the earth, followed by waves of Mega-armored Nobz. Trajann stood valiantly against them, but the huge battlewagon proved to be just too sturdy (or too ramshackle) to take down easily. He found himself beset by Meganobz while trying to down the clanking behemoth of a vehicle. The Blade Champion lept into the fray, killing swathes of the heavily armored Nobz himself, but the waves were just too many. Even a single slip in coordination and the massive saws or pincers of the Ork suits could damage. With the battlewagon continuing to grind down their line of troops, they had to cede the point and make a fighting retreat. This was not Holy Terra itself, and thus tactical discretion when damage started to pile up was the order Trajann enforced. He didn’t want to lose a single brother to the odd happenstance of an Ork attack while they were responding to a different matter.
One valiant brother had fallen in the main line, while the rest had retreated in the face of considerable damage. Given a chance, the brothers could cut through the Orks’ armor easily–but the sheer numbers advantage of the Orks, plus the fire of their combi-rokkits and skorchas took a toll in terms of damage. Numerous brothers took enough damage to need to pull back to safety.
One lone Shield Captain in Terminator Armor stood firm, refusing to cede the ground while the enemy still stood. Whether he had a link to the planet, a streak of stubbornness, or a vow against the Orks it didn’t matter: he stood toe-to-toe with the massive Morkanaut and resolved to take down the giant monstrosity before he left the field.
Seconds bled into minutes as the titanic clash continued. All the other Custodes had left the field, calling to their companion over vox that he should come with them, that this was a moment for discretion. The remaining Meganobz were turning around, consolidating objectives on the battlefield, and starting to look in his direction. The Morkanaut’s attacks were being stopped by careful parries alongside the raw power of his armor’s protective field generator, but even his near-eternal strength and training started to waver. Blow after blow came closer to hurting him, and the occasional weapons shot (as the thing blazed away with all guns as well) managed to wound him. His strikes were damaging the thing, limiting its own attacks more and more. But still, it wasn’t enough. The massive claw swung and he was a little too slow, and it seized his leg. With a surprisingly quiet “snip” the leg came off entirely, and the Shield Captain fell to the ground. The mighty machine started swinging again and again down onto him, pulverizing his form further and further–the smoke and steam from the rents where his weapon had scored the metal frame of the Ork machine seeming like boiling anger at this foe.
Pict caps of the fight–gathered by data-servo skulls–were relayed to Trajann’s display. He watched his brother, veteran of a thousand fights, battle valiantly but fall to the Morkanaut. His blood boiled. The Orks needed to be stopped. This was not Terra, but it was the Segmentum Solar. This was the domain of Man, not of Orks. He vowed they would return this fight to the Orks tenfold, and that the fallen Shield Captain’s sacrifice and fervor would not be forgotten. He appended the data file to auxillary artisans, to have a new vambrace made for the Shield Captain that would replace the fallen one–to honor his legacy.
Painting Progress
Finished up three Meganobz (from a set of 12 total new ones to add to my “Deffwing” force). Super-fun to complete them as always.
More planetary empires continues, and my Orks have a foothold on one of the asteroids! Now to expand forces onward (mine are the Red logo Orks on the map):
The following battle report is from a fun, but decidedly one-sided fight against Frank’s Harlequins army.
Game Three
Big Mek Ursatz was having a particularly un-Orky feeling his mega armor mob made their way through some cathedral ruins on the asteroid they had landed upon–it must have been an Imperial moon at some point that had been blasted to bits by some really big bang. It was an un-Orky feeling because it seemed like something his Grot Oiler would be feeling instead: the feeling that the signals on his git-finder detection arrays built into his armor were being deceived by something dead sneaky and kunnin’. And the fact that he couldn’t smash the feeling with his claw or shoot it with his kustoma mega-blasta, well that made it all the worse and more grot-like.
Ursatz should have felt like the Big Mek that he was: his boyz were all outfitted in some seriously heavy gear, his tunneling battlewagon invention was not only lethal in battle but could help in clearing paths through the dense terrain, and most recently he’d repaired up a ruined Morkanaut whose thunderous stride accompanied the marching blocks of Meganobz.
The Orks were there for the scrap, as Warboss Drozgurk had demanded they have a steady supply of scrap so his Nobz could always be in the best of the best armor. Even tho they weren’t Bad Moonz, Ursatz had a feeling that Drozgurk would have made a fine Bad Moon with his proclivities. The squads of Meganobz fanned out to locate the scrap piles, and swarms of Gretchin laborers moved to take them away. Maybe it was that the Beakies that were patrolling this chunk of space rock weren’t fighting them yet–they was with another off-shoot of the Waaagh over on a nearby Shrine World. But again, the odd readings on his git-finder kept registering, and the needle vibrated stronger and stronger.
Suddenly, out of nowhere, shapes started materializing from the ruined background. Images of almost pure-white light, their forms shrouded in the brightness, bipedal warriors started streaming across the courtyard toward the Ork force. The drill-equipped Bonebreaka sped forward through the loose dirt and rock mixture to come to grips with the shapes, but it was too late. Fire from spinning and shimmering flying boats started tearing the battlewagon to bits, along with the Morkanaut as well. Some of the weapons were various energy types, but the tell-tale one revealed itself when the swarm of labor grots were cut down: a hail of shuriken meant panzies. And soon enough it was clear these were those laughin’-and-dancing panzies with their camouflage-pattern clothes. “Like Blood Axes…” Ursatz thought: “dey iz still able to be dead sneaky in the middle of nothing because of da patterns.”
He finally got a good look at one of them as it appeared behind their lines, and sprinted across the open ground and into the remains of a ruined cathedral where Warboss Drozgurk was searchin’ up some teef or something. It didn’t surprise Ursatz that the foe was wearing red in his checks and dags camouflage given how fast he could run. The assault on Drozgurk was sudden, and effective. Before Drozgurk even knew what was happening he was cut up in eighteen different spots, and one of his legs was severed at the knee. All the boyz piled in that direction to get Drozgurk to safety, or maybe because that’s where the krumpin’ was happenin’. Either way, that left the rest of the force to get shot up by jets that flew around in circles. Ursatz called for the “attack in another direction” (as Orks don’t retreat), and they left whatever scavenge was there to the panzies–along with both the wrecked battlewagon and the wrecked Morkanaut which still was flaming from an explosion. Ursatz weren’t sure how he and iz boyz would stop da laughin’-and-hidin’ panzies if they met again, but he was starting to work on some hunches.
Painting Progress
Getting the process of the armor down on these guys, and really liking how it’s turning out. Finished two more groups of three Meganobz, and I’ve got 12 more to go! One squad of nine and two squads of six feels pretty epic in doing up a Deffwing sort of feel (akin to the all-terminators Deathwing army Dark Angels Space Marines can field).
The little bit of blue on power coils is just enough, and maybe my favorite part of the models. I also like the scratches and dents and how they turn out nicely with highlights and lowlights together.
In addition, I finished up a Morkanaut for our Knight Night Fight Night 2 event. Pretty pleased with how it turned out as well. The other vehicles will have less red (more balance of black panels and metal, just by the shape of the models), but this one was still really fun. The model is kinda stinky in the game: potential to kick out a ton of damage on a lucky turn, but really dependent on dice spikes. Still, the Knight Night event was a tag-team match where I paired it with a Stompa, so giving that invulnerable save seemed like the thing to do. Probably won’t field it super-often except in really big games, but was great to build and paint, and makes a cool centerpiece.
Making good progress, even tho I’m starting Orks much later in the year than I’d like. We’re 154 days into 2022, and I’m only at 58 points of painted Orks. Again, my goal is to paint 365 points of some same army. And I’ve definitely painted up a lot of Necrons and Drukhari and Eldar this year already, not to mention Genestealer Cult. But still, one army needs to be the focus and I’m getting back to my Ork roots. So time to pick up the pace for the summer.
[This is a battle report from game one of our Shrine World Planetary Invasion set of linked games that I and a few friends are running]
It was a near dawn, and quiet in the courtyard of memorials honoring those who sacrificed their lives during the fifth Donarian Gulf expedition. The Shrine World of Suldon Tertius was covered in such collections–pilgrims who wanted to pay proper respects could expect to spend sixteen months of dedication to visit each and every site on the planet. However, most of the current pilgrims were currently held in large hab defense structures, hastily armed with what firearms they could be provided as rough masses of conscript infantry. As the Orks had arrived at Suldon.
The center of the park, with its entry-ways to the the underground catacombs of the penitent fallen and carefully manicured hedges and park-lets of trees, had fallen under the shadow of the Roks that had appeared in the system. The space battle had been short and quick, as even with the Space Wolves Battle Barge present to support the system defenses the Orks were just too numerous and the Astartes transport had to retreat to a safe distance on the far side of the system’s sun after considerable damage. The fact that it had destroyed six of the Ork Roks and still had to retreat was a testament to the multitudes of force that the Orks had brought: a full sixteen Roks remained operational, with countless Kroozas and escort craft circling around them.
The Sisters of Battle and the Space Wolves who had landed had begun fanning out across the surface of the Shrine World, but with Ork assaults there was always some uncertainty. Different pods of defense started forming, gravitating toward the various shrines of fallen warriors almost subconsciously. When the Orks could strike anywhere, being close to the statue immortalizing a fallen comrade or martyr had just just seemed… natural.
The delay in the Ork landings was worrying all the Imperial commanders. There were clearly bulk landers all through the Ork forces, but the normal uncoordinated stream of them toward the ground was not happening. They were delaying for some reason. That may have calmed some of the Ministorum leadership, but the Space Wolves were wary–as any time Orks acted oddly there was something bigger at stake. What command were they waiting for?
Turned out it wasn’t a command so much as a strategy, as with a sudden shuddering corona of energy in the sky huge discharges started firing on each one of the Roks. There were huge engines in them with enormous whirling gyros, presumed to be part of the crude vessels’ propulsion systems. And maybe they still were. But the bursts of electric blue sparks across each of them were answered by huge bursts of electric blue on the surface of the Shrine world. Millions of glass candle holders exploded in unison across all the shrines as wave after wave of strange electrical discharge were focused on the ground all across the planet. And soon enough, what had seemed to be some sort of planetary-sized energy weapon at first revealed its true nature: they were bursts of crude teleportation energy. The Orks were teleporting their vanguard forces to the surface all over, and raiding groups charged even while they were starting to materialize. From bands of whole Meganobz striking in spearhead formation to sets of trukks, wagons, and even larger vehicles of destruction, whole Ork warbands were materializing in haphazard fashion all over the surface of the planet. Only then did the bulk haulers start to descend on the planet, seeming to use the teleport strike as the window to land the rest.
The initial onslaught of the Orks was sudden and came from every direction. Materializing trukks took off at breakneck speed, disgorging their Trukk Mobz right into the lines of the Adeptus Sororitas. While flamers took their toll, the raw force of the Orks’ savagery dropped Battle Sisters left and right.
At the heart of the Sororitas’ forces were some Paragon Warsuits and an Immolator tank. The flames and raw firepower from both started clearing Orks as fast as they could arrive. A desperate group of Kommandos tried to unleash a Bomb Squig to detonate on the tank, but sadly the wiring or explosives must have been a dud as the beast was merely crushed under the steel tracks of the Sororitas tank.
The Space Wolves unleashed their elite Wulfen infantry to bolster the Sororitas lines, answering Ork fury with their own. The sheer numbers of Orks and the deadly Power Claw of their Nob slowly whittled down the savage warriors–their contemptuous armor only able to stop most blows but not all, and the sheer volume of Orks they faced seemed innumerable.
On another front of the battlefield, one of the Ork Warbosses charged past his lines with a frenzy to reach a Space Wolves dreadnaught. With a mighty howl he braved the guns, the bullets bouncing off of his armor and flames charring his skin. Reaching the dreadnaught, his power claw tore into it, disabling cables and pistons before finally sheering the central column of the metal giant itself. The suit tumbled to the ground as he howled in triumph.
Not every Warboss fared as well: the Bad Moonz Warboss found himself facing a Wulfen Dreadnaught. Even with his shiny armor he could not withstand the frenzy of the Space Wolves’ ancient, and he was forced to retreat with a huge set of gashes and one of his arms hanging by just a string of tendons (he was already thinking about which Mad Dok would be best to staple it back on for him so he could get back into the fight).
Subsequent waves of Orks kept appearing as the tellyportas flared on the Roks in the sky. Ancient battlewagons that have seen hundreds of battles (and hundreds of repairs) emerged from the shimmering energy, all laden with more and more Orks. A valiant Castigator crew started firing their multitude of heavy bolters and turret cannon into the hordes, cutting them down as fast as they were arriving. Because the Orks were showing up piecemeal, the Space Wolves and Sisters both got chances to reload, recover, and recoup ground in the face of the onslaught.
A band of Meganobz surged forward to try and loot the shrine they presumed was at the foot of a great hero statue, only to be answered by an intense counter-charge from the Space Wolves. While the ordinary chain swords did little to the armored behemoths–literally each almost a tank or dreadnaught themselves–the merciless Thunder Hammer of the Sergeant of the squad laid considerable waste to them. The Orks were finally cut down, leaving the shrine intact and that side of the battlefield safe from Ork aggression.
Sustaining the tellyporta attack seemed to be starting to cause problems. One of the remaining Roks in the sky suddenly exploded with blue energy as the engines used to power the transporters must have overcome whatever non-existent safety procedures the Orks didn’t put in place. A set of cruel battlewagons with drill-like nosecones started to shimmer into the battlefield but instead disappeared into the void with the explosion. The Orks were finally bringing some bigger units, but it was proving to be too little and too late to give them a foothold on the center of the Shrine city. Even a mighty Skullhamma battle fortress was brought to a standstill thanks to the resilience and might of the Paragon Warsuits.
One band of Shoota Boyz was able to close on the entrance to the catacombs, even while the rest of the forces were repelled. A squad of Sisters of Battle stood resolute, pouring bolter fire and flamer promethium into the advancing Orks to keep them at bay. Not a single Ork survived to fight them, and the entrance to the catacombs–where the real prize of tens of thousands of martyr’s skulls, and the teeth inside them, waited.
The Orks had been beaten due to their piecemeal arrival, and their tellyporta sneak attack effetively blunted. With the shock and awe of the strike passed, the reinvigorated forces of the Imperium intended to push the advantage: finding pockets of Orks from the various landing craft, surrounding them, and eliminating them. Meanwhile the Warbosses were desperately trying to organize all the disparate bands of Orks and materiel into proper krumpin’ shape to push back against the humans’ advances. The next battle for the Shrine world loomed on the horizon.
Painting Showcase
Painted up a few units for this battle, including a Warboss that I’m particularly pleased with. I’ve been swapping around which Clan I’ve wanted to play, and tried a few in the game. So I wanted one who could reasonably be most any clan: Goffs, Snakebites, or Evil Sunz could all work for this, and certainly Blood Axes (no uniform camo but uniformity in armor) and a Freebootaz clan would work too. I’m especially liking the yellow squigs with all the red (and I want to paint up a unit of Squighog Boyz soon to see if that continues to look good on the larger models.
I finished the highlighting on the first of the units of Meganobz. I’ve got two other trios almost there (just need the final bright highlights on the armor). Pretty pleased with them, and my plans of doing a “Deffwing” style army seem to be well-placed. It’s silly, probably not very good, but a lot of fun to run!
Finally, the battlewagon that never showed up for the battle (my reserve rolls were horrendous in this game… literally 15 PL of models never were placed on the table until it was far too late for them to make a difference). This is a slight mod and repaint of a Death Guard assault drill I modded up (from a Mantic Games cyber-rats driller kit): added some Ork plates and glyphs and a single big shoota, and behold: a Bonebreaka Battlewagon. It turned out pretty slick, and just kinda silly to imagine the Big Mek who decided that drilling their way into a fight made sense.
That’s all on the painting front: for the next update I’ll certainly have more Meganobz done, and perhaps a fun bigger surprise!
The Planetary Empires Crusade campaign at my local shop (the amazing Drawbridge Games in Pittsburgh, PA: https://www.facebook.com/groups/499640580206921) continues to go on, as new players join and the cluster of planets are joined by some mysterious asteroids. And while I’d been doing some raiding (just taking territory away from others as I swapped thru lists/armies), it’s time to rejoin with an active terrain-taking faction. And a new project. Because of course, new project.
Prologue
Aboard the Rok star fort, Big Mek Ursatz, was putting the finishing touches on the last of the tellyporta pads. His Warboss, Drozgurk, was planning something big. They’d maneuvered the Rok into the system alongside some larger chunks of a moon or planet that were loosely swirling a bunch of planets–planets where wars were raging with all sorts of foes. Perfect spot for the attack. Drozgurk knew that this was Bad Moonz space, so he had taken his time–and had Ursatz really make sure the boyz had all the good gear. They’d kitted up a whole host of Nobz in Mega Armor, ready for teleport strikes all over the surfaces of these planets: landing groups to create the beachhead that the other boyz could come through with conventional landings. With the chanting reaching a fever pitch, Ursatz went to the grand control panel, where a big switch was waiting to be thrown. He could see rows and rows of the clanking armored Meganobz watching him, and without a second thought flipped the switch so the tellyportas started buzzing and sending each group off to who knows where.
Game One:
Big Mek Ursatz’ group landed in a Shrine area of a planet, and immediately set out to do what they do best: loot and destroy. Soon enough, the Sisters of Battle answered the call, as the Orks were poking around the sacred shrines of the planet. At this point the Sisters command didn’t realize what the Orks were looking for, so they committed a small expeditionary force to probe the Ork force and find its origin (still not realizing these were teleport strikes from high in the system).
While the Sisters had some heavy weapons, they did not have enough to deal with the sheer weight of the heavy armored Meganobz that clomped their way through the Imperial streets. The occasional melta shot would demolish one of them, but the flamers and bolters did very little to halt the nobz’ advance. And once they got there, the sisters were torn to shreds by the furious attacks.
It was the lone Canoness who held the line against the Ork attack longer than expected. Maimed survivors fled to the rear lines where hospitallers waited. She survived wave after wave of assaults, managing to take blows as glancing and continuing to dish out destruction, primarily with her plasma pistol (that was running white hot with use). Finally, only after the last of the Sisters had made it free was did she finally try to retreat herself, only to be cut down at that point by the last few Meganobz. Already, imagifiers are working to spin the stories of her valiant sacrifice in the face of the Ork onslaught.
Game Two:
Bike Captain Telleem had his hands full on this mission to the Scylla Quintus system. The “Fangs of Shang”, the Deathwatch contingent that worked with Inquisitor Kryia Draxus, had been notified of the sheer number of different xenos that were plaguing the system and pitching raids against Imperial targets and each other. While Brother Lothar the Dreadnaught served as a stalwart, the rest of Telleem’s forces were experiencing the usual moments of confusion when battle brothers hard-drilled for centuries to fight with their own Chapters now had to team up with warriors of various different sorts. The differences in fighting styles across the Adeptus Astartes never failed to wow him when he thought about it.
Orks had been in the system for a while, but it seems like a new Clan was sending massed raiding parties in every direction through the system now. The prior ones were of the Bad Moon Clan, focused on their firearms. These new raiders were more heavily armored, and had devastatingly struck a blow against the Sisters of Battle in another quadrant. Their armor was Red, but it was unclear which Clan they might be (as every Clan had the belief that red pigment paints and dyes increase velocity potential of those that wear the color). Bike Captain Telleem had dispatched scouts and outriders both to watch for signs of Ork planetfall, and was surprised when his squad of Eliminators radioed in that they’d found an Ork assault party–but there was no telltale trace of smoke or sounds of crashing jet that explained their presence. It’s almost like the Orks appeared out of thin air. It was doubly-concerning, as the entire gang of them were outfitted in the heaviest of Ork armors available. Telleem raced his forces to reach the site where his Eliminators were staked out and observing the Ork advance.
The Orks were trudging their way through a persistent radiation cloud, their feet turning up the dust into the air that carried the radioactivity from some prior weapons strike. Telleem’s forces struck, and had the advantage of range on the slower-moving Orks. Eventually some of them reached Brother Lothar, only to be pulped by his massive power fist–the ancient war suit suffering only minor damage from their tearing claws. The final wave of Orks fell, leaving much of Telleem’s force intact.
Yet he had not figured out how they were getting to the surface, and where the broader Ork force’s punch would fall. Telleem finished filing his report for Inquisitor Draxus with the following conclusion: “Initial Ork foray in sector 14 neutralized, source of assaults unknown. Seek further intelligence to isolate threat.” He then went to break up a fight that was brewing between a petulant Mantis Warrior and a surly Son of Medusa. The work of the Deathwatch was what he was made for when xenos were approaching on the battlefield. Less so at other times.
Painting Progress
Some initial painting on the Orks. This is the test model for the color scheme, which is the same exact scheme I use on my Drukhari hah. I think the highlights are a bit toward the comic style but then the Orks benefit from that–and it accentuates the battle damage and shoddy construction without having to look “messy”.
First finished Unit is a Big Mek in Mega Armor with Kustom Force Field and Grot Oiler. He’s likely of much more use with other non-Mega Armored models (as a weapon needs to be a -5 modifier for his Kustom Force Field to matter). But still, I liked the model and wanted to start with him.
More to come: going to get to a full 9 Meganobz at first, then grow from there.
Painting Challenge 2022 Progress
Well… now it’s Orks… maybe? Maybe I should lump all my stuff this year together? But let’s get it started with Orks and maybe we can hit the big number hah. So here goes:
The Dark Muse 